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ki.Ruminations | ____/// luminoushadow |||______
May200906

I’ve always been fascinated with virtual worlds and this predisposition manifested in me an enduring infatuation with a world that I could somehow, mysteriously, exercise a degree of control; and further, I was determined to unravel the heart of its mystery. Acting is creating a simulacrum of reality; it is surrendering the solidified self to become a nimble shape-shifter. An actor hollows himself to be a universal container of substance; at once, to produce an effect, be effective, without being affected. The eagerness of youth gravitates toward role models to align its aspirations; my ally, is a malleable sense of conscience that lends me the ability to be essentially whatever I wanted, provided that I have the fortitude to endure the opposing forces, and the focus to be a self-catalyst for change. This self-induced invocation of change parallels the art of acting because when the actor assumes a role, the character consumes him for the duration. After the role expires, a residual imprint of the character remains, and it becomes to him an asset at his disposal.

May200906

What’s the difference between a ‘crazy’ person and a ‘normal’? The former is incomprehensibly ignorant of the fact while the latter matter of factually commits incomprehensible crazy acts in spite of cognizance; neither, can truly know each other’s condition. Further, one is normally crazy and the other acts crazily normal to attest his sanity. As for me, I am crazily normal under circumstances where normal people would be normally crazy, and I’m normally crazy, borderline neurotic, about the craziest normal things where normal folks would just be in their element. Does this make me crazy or normal? That’s right! Normal…because I’m fully aware that I’m normally crazy. So much so, in fact, that I simply tell these voices in my head that provoke me to do the normally craziest things to just all piss-off and leave me alone. Sheash, haven’t these crazy voices nothing better to do than to pester normal people?

May200906

There have been times when certain experiences elevate my being to an inspired state, whether the stimulus were in words, visuals, or a combination of sensory perceptions, I can feel a physical reaction that originates from the crown and descends internally through my body to the area above the solar plexus, expanding horizontally to fill my face, arms, and hands with an electrically-charged tingling sensation in its descent which causes my to shudder as if exposed to cold weather. Perhaps the best description of this condition can be defined as a “spiritual orgasm.”